Suicide Awareness 2020

Back in March as you may not know, my brother Ray took his life. Never thought I would have to write that sentence.

Here we are months later awaiting a proper time for burial rights and the honor guard, fulfilling his wish to be buried at the military graveyard a few miles from where I sit writing this.

Ups and down. Dark and light. Many places to go when you try to process something you will never understand even if you can understand. This event took the family to its knees. It knocked me through the sidewalk and in a hole, it took me months to climb out of. But I climbed out. Not finished grieving of course...I am just not in that hole of despair. This was the most painful event I have lived through in my life.

So, if you are feeling off. If you are feeling hopeless. If you are feeling lost; please do not stay silent. In the words of the song Ray and I would sing together every time we hung out...shout it out loud! In fact, you can call me at 630-849-7157 even if I do not know you.

I miss you Ray, you shithead (said with love and admiration).

The hero I looked up to all my life is now gone. The beautiful thing is I look up to my two beautiful sons. Seth and TJ. Both fine men who miss their goofy Uncle Ray and stepped up this year when the fires needed to be put out. Total respect and humility...plus a shitload of love ❤️